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Example 500: Jade is Unbreakable!
This is the Five-hundredth week of using the "Perfect Anime Girl Sheet". Notice: This Blog may contain Unmarked Spoilers. *We return from where we left off last week. Topaz is in the middle of a mysterious field created by Rin, while Riri lays unconscious at the base of a broken obelisk. Rin is also there, with her lamp of absorbed strength, and facing her is a tall, green-haired meganekko.* : J-Jade? I've never heard of such a character! And all the characters named “Jade” on MAL are guys! Er, I think so at least. I'm surprised that MAL was working well enough that you were able to search. Wait, no, characters returned this week (darn, this joke makes a lot less sense now). But you're right. Jade here is a personal creation. : I was created by Topaz as a part of his series of self-pandering girls! That's right! ...You shouldn't praise it like that, I suppose. : It's not wrong though! And from what I hear you not only invaded a fighting tournament-one, I might add, that I was NEVER invited to-but you also used illegal steroids to beat up your opponents and steal their powers! : Well, it's not quite steroids, but I did use magic! : Same difference! It's time to teach you a lesson, and not just because you've been beating up my otouto! : HA! He isn't your “otouto”! It's just his dumb powers making you think that! : What are you talking about? My otouto's name is “Topaz”! : … Man, that power is really-wait, no. You're being serious, aren't you? : Why wouldn't I be serious about my own otouto? : Seems the pandering goes deeper than I thought... Anyway, what do YOU think you can do to me? : Beat you up! : Be serious! I have the powers of FOUR powerful female warriors, plus the demonic powers of Ririchiyo! You'll never-PWWAAAH GORF GORF! *Jade suddenly cracks the ground below her foot, leaping at Rin with a powerful fist. She interrupts her and sends the over-inflated villain rolling.* : What were you saying? : Grrr, a lucky shot. But once I fully power up, I'll be able to defeat you easily! : You have an extra form? Like with glowing hair and stuff? Great! I thought that this was going to be boring! : I'll just tap into the power of the four girls and.. THERE! : That's it? No visual sign? BORING! : I'll show you whose BOR- : PERFECTLY NORMAL PUNCH! *Rin charges Jade, who puts her arm out with absolutely no effort. Still, Rin hits it so hard that she flips onto her back. Jade yawns at this.* : I thought that this would be an INTERESTING battle. Come on, show me a little big more talent! *Jade looks intimidating to Rin, her glasses shining in a threatening way. She even flexes her fingers, making a fist and cracking her knuckles. Rin takes a deep breath.* : You might be threatening, but there's no way that you can defeat me! I am invincible! : Look, I get that you might be stronger than the average girl. But invincible? I care not for such things! I would punch a literal GOD if I could! Do you really think a puny girl like you has ANY chance against me? : Of course, as I have the power of FIVE GIRLS! KYAAAH! *Rin, deciding to use Tomoyo's skills at kicking makes a leaping kick at Jade. However the tall green-haired sister seems to disappear, appearing right behind Rin. She then punches her upward.* : BEEFCAKE HAMMER! *With that Jade grabs Rin's leg from behind, crossing her victim's arms over the leg. She then slams down head first, breaking the ground as they land. Rin is knocked unconscious.* K.O! : Was there any doubt? *Jade brushes the dust off her hands.* : Well, since that's done how about we get started with the reason I'm here? You mean you didn't come to save me from the horrible villain? : Well, consider that a bonus. I came to help you celebrate your 500th blog! Of course! That makes sense as I like doing girls I've created like this! Wait, I should rephrase that... Oh well, my readers know what I mean. And as always, let's get started! Today's girl is: Jade Teioh from Boku no Meganekko Oneesan/BokuMega *Unknown to Jade or Topaz Rin's unconscious body starts to twitch.* Head Hair Jade has beautiful long, flowing hair that I really love. It does have some issues with the length, as the very tips seem to cover her ass slightly though not enough to completely hide her cheeks either (only a small amount of the top). Her hair flows really well down her back, being mostly straight but curving out slightly at about the base of her neck. Jade's bangs are really nice as well, being a somewhat-hime cut though her short sides do mean that it's not completely “hime”-like. Then again there's nothing wrong with blunt bangs as I really like them. Matching her namesake gemstone Jade's hair is also a dark green. While not as great as say, black or purple, it is a suitable color that I enjoy. Fortunately her hair isn't so thick and messy to make her look like a gremlin from behind either. Overall I obviously enjoy Jade's hair, with the only complaints being relatively minor ones. Grade: A : You do know it's not like my hair is green 'cause I don't wash it, right? Of course not. I know that's your natural hair color, and it's a very pretty one. : Good, as I occasionally get questions about that. Then I usually punch the one that asks it, though very lightly. Serves them right for thinking you'd be unclean. Though I do wonder if your long hair is ever a distraction in a fight. : Like if people pull it? Certainly not! I've never even had it cut, which is quite the achievement as I fight girls like Kaede and Lydia all the time. Girls avoiding hair cuts are always great! : Certainly! Plus I like having the “handicap” that long hair causes me to have, being careful not to have it touch anyone but not have it affect my combat. Plus it looks awesome as EVER! I agree, as long hair looks really pretty. : I meant because it's cool when it sways in the wind, like a super hero's cloak! That too! But how about we continue onward! Eyes Jade also has green eyes, mostly matching her hair color if very slightly lighter. Still, it's a very pretty color and makes her eyes look as brilliant as her namesake gem. It's a pretty color, and while three other girls in the franchise have green eyes (Maya, Aoi, and Lydia) they each seem to have a unique color to it. She does have a tsurime, like many girls from this series, with particularly emphasized corners though without (visible) eyelashes. Jade's eyes aren't as narrow as Momoyo, who she is based on, but she still looks very sexy and dominant when it comes to her eyes. Especially when she's about to lay the smack down on some foe. Overall her eyes look really great, both with the color and shape. We can't forget about Jade's glasses though, and while I'm not good at describing glasses she does have a nice pair of thick-framed blue glasses with circular frames. Even when fighting she doesn't take them off, much like many girls in the series. She does need them, rather than just using them as a decoration, but even when half-blind she's a great fighter. As said she does especially well here, looking beautiful on all accounts. Grade: A : My glasses are one of my charm points! That's why I rarely take them off, even to train! Are you sure they aren't actually weighted glasses? : Of course not, that sounds really silly. Besides, what would that do, make my ears and nose super-strong? But I'm glad that you appreciate the fact that my hair and eye colors are similar. Of course! It suits you really well, much like your glasses. : D'awww, you're going to make me blush! That just sounds cute, though speaking of your face... Face Jade has a very lovely face, even if that seems to be the part I'm weakest in creating. That's more my own skills though. Anyway, Jade has some of my favorite aspects including small features and a very small nose (as small as I can make it, at least). Being that she's somewhat trim her cheeks aren't too rounded and her chin is somewhat pointed though neither are bad. And being fair that's just because she looks a lot like Momoyo as well. Still, Jade looks really great though I suppose that at this point it's understandable why I love her so much! Grade: A- : Don't worry, we realize that you aren't the best artist in the world. We know that you're trying to make all your harem girls a little bit different, all while retaining a soft gentle look. I do like soft girls... : Ara, in more ways than one... *Topaz blushes as Jade giggles at his flustered look. However, her quick instincts realizes something is up. That's right, and looking next- : Wait a minute... you're back up, aren't you? Er... : I mean YOU! *Jade turns around and points to Rin, who was trying to sneak up on the duo.* : That's right! You may have caused me to lose one of my captives and made me unconscious, but I'll make sure to get my revenge! Using Videl's strength as well! HOORAH! *Rin leaps at Jade, her arm back and ready to punch using the powers of gravity. The meganekko just looks up at her and smiles.* : Your tactics are no match for me-FORBIDDEN MOVE: FUJI SMASHER! *Jade reels her arm back and uppercuts Rin, sending her flying with her eyes whited out. The villain then rolls against the ground again.* WOW! So that was banned because it was powerful? : Not at all. I dislike using it because it tears up my sleeves. *Jade shows off her right arm, which was doing the punching. It's shredded all the way up to the shoulder, even if it's not able to be seen in the image.* That's fair, especially as the readers won't be able to see that. : Not like anything in particular is showing though. It's just embarrassing that I'll have to tell Natsume I ruined another of her shirts. I thought that shirt looked a little fancier than you would normally wear. Maybe it's time to go sleeveless, like a lot of other fighting girls. : Hmmm, then I'd look even more like Momoyo. Or like that Nana Shimura gal. Sounds like a great idea, though I like wearing shirts with sleeves when I'm not fighting. You do look good in them. Though speaking of which, let's continue with the blog! Body Build Jade has an amazing body. She's tall, being 175 cm and 57 kg which are very good sizes (especially when her otouto is only 153 cm, meaning she'll marshmallow him with a hug). Her three sizes are 90/58/90, meaning that she has an hourglass balanced figure. Her legs look very sexy, especially her thick thighs which can put her opponent in a sexy hold, and while very strong she's not too bulky either. She's the type that has a lot of hidden muscle, except for perhaps some sexy abs on her stomach (though even then they aren't too “hard” or stiff either). Her feet are sexy, though she doesn't have a lot of shots nor does she wear much to accent her lower body. Well, except for her ass. Her ass is really great, being slightly larger than Momoyo's own peach (hers is 88 cm, though in general Jade takes a lot of Momoyo's measurements), and Momoyo herself has a really nice, big ass herself! Though I suppose that may be a given considering what series she's from and her own “little brother” (even if it's not as ass heavy as it could be). That said, Jade herself has a rare ass-attack in Bite of the Jade Scorpion ♥ (the heart is important). She beats up someone, backs up a bit and blows a kiss, then does a standing leap and flip to land ass-first on her “victim”. It's surprising that such a soft, squishy ass can be used as a weapon, but I wouldn't mind being hit by it sometimes. Overall Jade is a beautiful and sexy woman that's pretty much flawless, with a fair amount of chest and ass service plus other appealing places as well. She's perfect for a guy who likes obscenely strong yet still incredibly sexy and curvy women like me. Grade: A+ : I'm glad that all my training has given me a body that you consider “perfect”. Well, it's difficult to create a character that will cater to me well and not make her an outstandingly beautiful one. In fact some other areas I've had to kinda lower due to you being created specifically to cater to me. : Don't worry. I totally understand. I'm glad to look so great! You certainly do! So what do you do to train? : Just the usual. Don't tell me it's sit-ups, push-ups, and plenty of juice. : No, and it's not that Saitama's training either. It's hard to describe, but I do a lot of crunches and running as well as strength training. I have to keep myself in shape, after all. Why do you say that? : W-well. *Jade looks nervous.* : Don't tell my brother this, but, er, genes and stuff... I want to keep my youthful appearance as long as possible. I'm not sure what you're talking about. : Well, Mom is, er, genetics and... Well, let me put it in PreCure terms. Zettai's girls are more like Fresh PreCure, where all the mothers are beautiful, while Topaz's is more like Smile. Sure, there's lovely ones like Chiharu or Ikuyo, like how Aunt Aya and Maeka's mother Chizuru are really beautiful. Then again there's Mom, who is more like Tomoko... Well, save about 4-5 kids, of course. Hmmm, sounds like you have a mother sorta like Deku... : Yeah! Exactly! Like Inko! I suppose that I fear looking like that when I get older, so in response I exercised and now I'm SUPER powerful! And I imagine like Tomoko and Inko your mother has green hair too! : Right! But that's enough talking about Mom. Let's get back to me! Great plan! Chest Jade is very busty, much like a lot of the girls in the series as well as her creative-proxy Momoyo. At 90 cm she's pretty busty, though she's about average for the series with a pair of D-cups. Like many of the girls she is also very into giving paizuri, both to please her little brother and getting pleasure herself due to her sensitive chest. She also teases her brother with her large breasts quite a bit as he likes them so much. Jade also has small nipples, or so I'd assume considering I don't have “proof” but I do prefer that type of thing. She does show off her chest more than her ass, which is somewhat unfortunate but I don't mind all that much considering that she's so beautiful and fair. Overall it's possible that Jade is a relic of a past where I was more mamocentric, but I don't mind as a lot of her more recent ideas have been helping her out. Grade: A- : I am glad that your friend understands and respects your girls. Well, it's not like you're irritatingly mamocentric either. But I do thank him for that. : Hopefully he'll understand if I want to pamper my little otouto after the blog, right? *Jade winks at Topaz, flustering him.* W-well, I suppose that some girls are able to reward me like that. But I'm sure that it would have to be off screen and not implied. Hopefully we haven't already jinxed it. : Do not worry. I'm sure that you'll get quite the enjoyment after this blog is done. Ufufu... *Topaz swallows nervously, eventually continuing with the blog.* Clothes This may be Jade's worst area, though I suppose that as her creator I can put her in anything. That said, I'm not a good artist. As a result her default outfit seems to be a green karate uniform, with an orange belt (not due to that only being her rank but because that's what came with the outfit). She does seem to wear a lot of casual outfits, much like Momoyo does, and Jade can be put into many types of outfits as well. That said, I'm pretty indecisive when it comes to what sort of outfit she should wear. Cute outfits, such as gothic lolita outfits, might be too jarring with her tough and sexy appearance. Jade also prefers outfits that are easy to move around in, which might eliminate things such as suits that are too stiff. Then again, bodysuits and other tight outfits including small shorts would suit her well. Mmmm, there's a lot of outfits that Jade can wear, but sadly as her creator I'm not exactly sure what sort would suit her well. It's a big decision, but do know that Jade still has a lot of potential to grow. Grade: B : And there's a lot of festive episodes as well, at least with what Topaz imagines. Yukatas in the festival episode, mikos for New Years, and a lot more! I especially like the black bikini! Sounds sexy, and I'm guessing that's for the beach episode? : Of course, but there's more than just one. There's a small arc with Haruka's introduction as well as Aunt Aya's, and then after the harem has been recruited completely! Very nice, though hopefully it's a lot more fair than some other shows. : Don't worry. It's not like Souta has fanservice... I meant more that it's not mamocentric. : Well, a little. But asses still get great close ups! Even I show off my sexy thong ass a lot, like when I suplex a shark! Sounds dangerous! Much like a train, perhaps. : Sharks aren't that powerful, as they're weak to fighting! That said I will also state that most of the assier girls like Himawari and Charlotte, not to mention the more mature Mari and Selvaria get great shots too! Very good! : Mwaha! While you two have continued to talk about perverse things I was able to recover! : Again? It's barely a fight now. What, do you have good drops to farm or something? : I'm not sure what you mean by that, but I'm prepared for-PPPWWAAHH! *Jade sweeps Rin's legs, tripping her.* I thought Garland was the one that was supposed to knock everyone down... : Who said that's the end of the attack? : But tripping is a terrible strategy! H-hey, come back here! *Jade takes a few steps away from Rin, looks towards Topaz and blows him a kiss.* : Here comes your favorite attack, Topaz. And I'm sure your readers will like it too-Bite of the Jade Scorpion ♥! *With that Jade makes a standing jump, flipping in the air. She lands ass-first against Rin's face, hitting so hard with her fat ass (which jiggles in the tight pants she's wearing) that it cracks the ground under them. She then stands up, dusting off her ass as Rin lays there with a smile.* I'd be smiling too... : Of course! Heroes always smile, and that's why I'm grinning most of the time! That's not what-er, never mind. Let's get going with the blog! Mind Personality Jade is, by all means, a girl created specifically to appeal to my fetishes. The fetish in particular she represents is the “strong blood oneesan”-type, explaining why she has so many similarities to Momoyo from Majikoi (who I have mentioned quite a bit throughout this blog). Jade is so similar that the two even share a VA, though in Jade's case it's purely hypothetical. Anyway, she would be voiced by none other than Yuu Asakawa, the voice of Rider, Chisato, and so many great beauties that I like. She'd probably use a really seductive and dominant voice for Jade as well, which sounds amazing. Anyway, getting to Jade's personality, she's a really powerful fighter. One of the best too, able to destroy the enemies invading even before getting magical skills (and even then she prefers to use physical attacks). Jade is also one of the strongest girls on her side in Super Shimai Wars, a hypothetical game. She has high stats all around, good offensive-based and tanking skills (including a passive that increases the damage done and heals her for a certain amount when she defeats a foe), and has almost no downside to using her (there's the availability issue, but other than that I can't think of a good nerf to her). She's also a college girl, though I'm not quite sure what she studies (it was just an excuse for her slightly late appearance into the series). Jade is pretty laid back, but usually positive like heroes should be. Though I suppose that it may cross into “psychotic” due to battle lust sometimes, but I still really enjoy her. She's a great friend, older sister, and character that appeals to me really well. Jade is, in essence, a perfect character to me but the reason is that she was created specifically to appeal to me. While she's incredibly great, she's not in anything official and was created just for my sake which means that I don't want to give her a maxed score. I want to give other girls a chance, after all. Grade: A- Libido This might come at as a surprise to some of you, with Jade not getting an “A” here. I suppose that it's reasonable that she is quite perverse now, playing with her lucky younger brother quite affectionately and often. She even waits for him to arrive home each time he has fun with other girls as well, due to the two sharing a house. So she's not only perverse herself but she's understanding that the rest of the harem needs fun as well. Jade also pampers her otouto quite well, fulfilling his fetishes very well. However, that's the present day and the two had lived their whole lives together before that (at least before Jade went to college, but that's fairly recently and she soon returned). That means that there were ample opportunities for the siblings to get “together”, opportunities that Jade did not use. Sure she teased him playfully, but his virginity went to his “winner” Maeka instead. Not that I have a problem with that as both are beautiful meganekkos, but it is unfortunate for Jade's case. Still, she certainly hasn't lost any steam and will play with her younger brother at any opportunity she has. Oh, and I'll also mention that she gets a lot of shipping with her reverse trap friend Natsume and friendly rival honor blade Kaede too. Grade: B+ : So you dislike it that I allowed Maeka to pluck my otouto's “cherry”? That's not quite how I'd describe it, but that's a good point. Also, other than a total harem ending you wouldn't quite win. : One of the few battles I'm alright with losing. Then again... *Jade presses against Topaz's side, blowing and nibbling on his ear. He flusters from this.* H-hey, I said that this should be after the blog and off screen. : Yeah, but if I'm not aggressive I might lose you. Or worse, lose points. How about I do something that you'll really enjoy? *She then pushes Topaz down, sitting on his lap. She wriggles her fat ass, bouncing in a very sexy manner.* : How about this? I'm sure that your readers won't mind me doing a little of a lap sitting, would they? N-no, but I'm a bit worried with.... : Don't worry, enjoy my ass to your heart's content. *Jade whispers into his ear.* : Besides, I'm strong enough that it wouldn't matter what you do. I'll beat you up, ride you to our heart's content, and the whole time I'd humiliate you. Doesn't that sound fun, Topaz? Not that it matters, you have no choice in this matter. I'll rape you hard, and you'll enjoy every minute of it-huh? GWERK! : Already?! You're even more of a lightweight than my brother. S-sorry... : No worries. Besides, it looks like you got a level from that. A silly method, but at least your health is fully healed. *Indeed, and Topaz also gained 15 Defense and 5 Max HP.* So that's what the girl does to Link in his adventure... wait, that joke hasn't been over used, has it? : Perhaps. But do not worry. I'll make sure to train you to be my ultimate lover! There will be no rest for you after the blog ends! I'm beginning to see why the girls needed to unseal you... How about we continue with the blog? : Certainly. Once it's finished we'll finally be able to be alone. *Topaz swallows nervously again, but resumes the blog.* Age Jade is, sorta surprisingly, only 18. I would have expected her to be older, but no matter as it's not like the series has a shortage of older girls either. 18 is a really great age as well, especially when you include that she's a blood older sister and her brother is a 14 year old shota (and that she has incestuous feelings towards him). Probably the only issue is that she's just barely above 18, whereas there's many other girls who are older than her. Her birthday is also August 31st, much like Momoyo, meaning that she has a great month to be born in. Grade: A Total Grades: 92 Average score: 10.2 Final Grade: A- And that's the blog for this week. : Hmmm, so even when a girl is created to appeal to you they still cannot beat your “waifu”. I suppose that I was a little rougher on you than I would normally be. Don't hold it against me, please. : Ufufu, don't worry. I'll hold SOMETHING against you. And I'll be as rough as I want to be... *Topaz looks worried again, swallowing while flustered.* : Kah hah hah! You're so much fun to tease, you know! But don't worry. I know that we need to get out of this area. Now that the blog is done I can easily carry us all out! Do not worry, for I am here! Swooon~ : Stop your swooning this instant, Topaz! I still have Ririchiyo's power, and- *Rin appears to have demon wings, but she is stopped in mid-sentence as Jade appears in front of her.* : Topaz and I were talking, so can you kindly be quiet? : FOOL! You've played into my hand! Now, to just use this lamp- *Rin aims the lamp at Jade, but the tall sister is too much for her.* : CIRCLE! SQUAD! PUNNNCHH! *Jade punches Rin in the stomach so hard, hitting the lamp with so much strength that it breaks, that Rin is pushed backwards. Jade then seems to punch in a circle around her fist, though moving at such speed that it doesn't look like the one in the center has moved at all. She then follows it up with an uppercut from her left hand that slams Rin against the walls of the valley, causing the cliffs to get huge cracks. She falls unconscious on the ground.* : I sure hope that's enough to put her to sleep until we get back. I hope she isn't dead. That would make for a bad joke. : Don't worry. I still haven't used my full power! That just worries me about your power... But thanks for saving me. : Anytime, my sweet otouto. I just hope that you won't forget our little promise! Certainly not! : Good then. Let's get back to where you guys left from. *Jade picks up the two unconscious girls, though Riri awakens in her arms.* 160px: W-wait. What just happened... I remember getting attacked by Rin, and then.. then... She stole your powers, and apparently you fainted from it. She must have used her obelisk against you as well. : But there is nothing to fear, as I am here! 160px: What's the meaning of this, Topaz? I thought that you weren't going to do girls from your harem because they'd break the curve for the other girls! True, but this OC tradition needed a bit more meganekko to it. Plus she saved us! 160px: Then I shall apologize, Jade. I shall write-er, practice my penmanship, which may happen to be a long letter of apology. : Thank you for that. Now, let's get back! But how? : Like this: HOOOWWAAAAHHH! *Jade punches the air with such force that reality is split. In reality May and Hiroko helped, but they want to keep Jade thinking that she did it on her own so shhh. The four of them soon land back in the arena, though it seems that the battles are over.* : WHAT THE? Not only have the two girls that mysteriously left returned, but now there's a tall girl in the center stage! 160px: We left? I think that Rin set up an illusion of you two fighting, so when she fell unconscious the images went away. They must have considered it a mutual forfeit and the matches continued! : That's right! Wait, that was an illusion? Nevermind. Here, let us crown our new victor! : I may have returned to this accursed place after many years, but I am surprised that I have become the champion. 160px: Probably because Topaz already blogged you so he doesn't have to worry about you appearing in future competitions. Shhh, don't tell people my secrets! : Well, since Morgiana won she's able to fight Aldra now. That's still a thing? : So the reward for winning is MORE FIGHTING? That's my kind of tournament! 160px: Maybe you'll be able to come next year. Wait, no. I don't want to even THINK about facing you... : Wah hah hah, that's fair. Maybe I'll take a break for a year. But don't think that this is the last you've seen of me, Topaz! Certainly not. I'll be seeing you plenty later... : Ufufu... 160px: Topaz. What happened while I was unconscious? N-nothing... : All's well that ends well-wait, where's Rin? *Everyone looks around, but Rin is nowhere to be seen.* : I just had her! Don't tell me she's planning another attack. I imagine that after that last blow she'll never become a force of evil again... : You're right. I'm sure that she's being taught a lesson! *The three of them start leaving the stage.* Well, I suppose that this is where we part for now. At least until the blog ends. : Makes sense, and it's always good to see you. Hopefully we'll meet again! *She waves as she walks away, with Riri and Topaz returning the wave.* 160px: Likely, as Topaz probably wouldn't put the effort into creating your image if it wasn't going to be reused. Shhhh. Anyway, we have to think about who to talk about next week. 160px: I figured that you wouldn't have had a plan. And don't just look around like a cartoon character picking out a name- Hey, this looks kind of good. *Topaz looks at a perhaps familiar poster.* Look, it's an “All-franchise idol show”! That should be interesting! 160px: More overly convenient if I would call it anything. Don't be too picky. Now, let's see who will be here next Thursday. Ah! It's a strawberry from the planet strawberry! 160px: The voice actress?! Nope. Instead it's a lead of a long-running idol show. She sure looks good with her blond hair with red ribbon. 160px: Jeez, just tell the readers who she is! Well, let's just say that I've done her best blue friend a long time ago, while Zettai talked about her model brown-haired friend with a cool birthday as well... 160px: Wait, is this the same idol that Zettai talked about her mother? That's the one! Category:Anime Blogs